October magically disappears

Way back in September, I wrote about my Grandmother's birthday, some disappointing events in my life and how I drew encouragement from my family. Since then, My grandmother has died, I made a trip back to Kansas and helped produce a Halloween haunted house as a fundraiser for my son's school. Somewhere amid all of that October disappeared.

Traditionally, October is a difficult time of year, my parents' anniversary is Oct. 4, my mother died on Oct. 6 and her birthday was Oct. 17, so that makes for a melancholy month. But me and my family revel in Halloween. We used to throw a huge Halloween party for all of our friends, but with circumstances being what they are this year, we had to let that tradition go.

I thought it was going to be a quiet, fun Halloween spent at my friend Linda's place. It was on a Saturday this year, so we had been talking about spending the entire day together, culminating with taking the kids trick-or-treating as we had the last few years.

We were mistaken.

The PTSO at my son's school had this idea come up about throwing a haunted house fundraiser for the school. We hashed it around a bit and were on the verge of canceling it when an unbelievable opportunity manifested itself. I won't go into the gory details, but before I knew it Linda, me and our new-found friend Cathy Derley were all coordinating this event that grew monstrous before our eyes.

It was exhausting, frustrating, rewarding, thrilling, fun and exciting all at the same time. It did, however, overshadow that nice, quiet little Halloween Saturday we had planned. It also consumed the entire month, and was the biggest bash I have ever had a part in throwing.

Somewhere in the middle of the planning for this event, my grandmother, who had turned 100 at the end of August, died. Her burial ceremony was set for Oct. 16, the day before my mother's birthday. This added another layer of sadness to the month.

While the circumstances for the trip back to Kansas were grim, and the trip itself was a quick one, it was nice to be back in the shelter of my family, if only for a few days. Being with them lends me a strength and ability to appreciated the life I've had and the people I've shared it with.

The busyness of the haunted house was therapy for me, as well. It helped me let go of the sadness and melancholy that usually consume the month of October. It gave me a sense of accomplishment and a chance to work on and complete a big project. It's also given me a bit of an emotional boost and lots and lots of memories and new friends.

The job hunt is ongoing, although jobs to apply for are few and far between. I still haven't given up, though and am looking almost every day for new opportunities. Nov. 6 was the anniversary of the layoff announcement. It's hard to believe it's been a year.

In the meantime, I'm looking forward to Morgan's 4th birthday. He wants a shark birthday party. I never thought finding invitations and party supplies for a shark birthday would be so difficult, but apparently it is. So, it's off to a new challenge, creating invitations and figuring out how to make a shark birthday cake.

It's back to one step at a time and making my own happiness.